140411_kp_mauna_kea_P1010046_150_35I'm not sure what is happening right now. I've been feeling very calm, in amny ways, yet behind it all is this "kind of an urgency" feeling that goes along with it.

I know there are "things" going on all over the place, and all over inside of each being that's here, and I guess there's a lot happening that maybe I have no idea even what they are.

This planetary ride feels like it's about to come to an end. The YRFT* messages keep striking some kind of home within me, yet I still am in the state of knowing that I don't know what it all means. Eventually, it will just be "got". All at once, it will all "make sense".

There's times when I wonder "what the h--- I'm 'doing' here" and is it all really necessary for me to stay (whatever that means). Most of the time now, I on't even feel like going out and "playing", like bodysurfing, driving around this beautiful island, or shopping for "stuff", or being with people, or groups, or this or that. None of it draws me in to it. At least for the moment.

I'm not forcing anything. Just BEing in the moment.

So we'll see where this goes. And what the h--- is going to happen. And maybe I'll just keep writing posts like these that seem like they really don't say anything, or go anywhere.

And maybe that says it all.

Aloha, Kp